When I Cannot Use my Mouth
by María José
Ruiz Acosta
It had been raining
all the morning
When we met for the
first time.
Alluring, cosy,
naive and friendly,
That’s how you
seemed to my eyes.
But at that precise
moment
Hardly ever could I
see
That sometimes a
precious treasure
Hides a danger
inside it.
It had been raining
all the morning
When
began to grow it all.
I
felt hostage of your kisses
On
account of that true love.
But if I hadn’t
been so focused
On those feelings
deep inside
I would have been
more aware
Of whoever was
behind.
It had been raining
all the morning
When I thought you
felt involved
On my gloomy,
secret island
Where I always stay
alone.
But I wish I had
turned down
Those ideas from my
mind
And become much
more sceptical,
Closer, nearer to
life.
It had been raining
all the morning
When the first
mourning took place.
So much I had
idolized you
That nobody could I
blame.
But inside that
voice reminded me
That I always used
to be
The runner-up of
all the races,
The only one that
never wins.
It had been raining
all the morning
When I wish I could
have been
Much more
brilliant, even brighter
Than what nature
gave to me.
But the
one-hundred-fold efforts
Only made just to
pretend
I am not just who I
really am,
I will never be the
best.
It had been raining
all the morning
When I found out
what you meant
As looking down on
my poor figure,
There’s no need to
go ahead.
But inside this
threadbare heart
I gave you one year
ago
There is passion,
hope, respect
And my trueborn
love below.
It had been raining
all the morning
When it all came to
an end.
There’s no need to
look for answers
Just to cure what
has been hurt.
But God knows, oh
yes, God knows
As I lick my
wounded world
That I am the first
place finisher,
Between us I loved
the most.
It has been raining
all the morning,
Still this craving
inside me.
Being your target
wasn’t easy
But even worse it’s
how I feel.
But, alas, this
latest hunch
Is still freaking
me out,
Whispering
throughout my body
When I cannot use
my mouth.
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